Marijuana. The Herb. Sweet Mary Jane. Cannabis. Weed. Bud. Whatever name you have for it, there’s no doubt about the fact it is one of the most heavily debated drugs on earth. Is it good or bad for you? Does it inspire creativity or kill motivation? All questions remain, to some extent, unanswered. One thing that is for certain however, is that when under its influence, memories can be made that last a lifetime. Funny ones, I may add. Whether it’s on the park, in the garage, or even a sneaky joint out your bedroom window, smoking the Ganja is rarely ever dull. So today we bring you WACKY BACKY: 10 TALES OF MARIJUANA MAYHEM. Enjoy!
1
Wacky Backy: Pronounciation
Slink, 23
“So me and two buddies had just smoked a gram of some proper chronic, this shit was hella dank and the crew had just come out of a T-break too, so it hit us like a freight train. I thought that my lighter was missing so I look for it for like 10 minutes only to find it in my pocket, me and my buddies laughed for a good 5 minutes at that, but that’s not the funny part. Me and the crew go into class, and our teacher knew we high, but he was really cool about it because we just kept our mouths shut and got on with it.
He walks up to us and quietly asks “How high are you?” And I swear on Snoop Dogg, my friend replied “It’s actually pronounced, Hi how are you?” The thing is, everyone in the class heard and completely lost it.”
2
Wacky Backy: Intruder!
Andrew, 19
“My buddies and I are smoking outside his house and once we finished up I put the bowl and grinder in the bushes next to my car so they don’t stink up my car. We go inside to play video games. While inside my friends older brother Daniel, maybe 22 years old, he didn’t know we were home and when he hears us he thinks we are robbing his house so he calls the cops. We are in the basement playing video games none the wiser. I go upstairs to get snacks and see a bunch of cops outside shining their flashlight looking at me. Me being high, I obviously freak the fuck out because I think they smelled the weed and are now investigating. I go back downstairs to tell my buddies about the cops. They freak the fuck out as well.
We were hiding in a closet for like 10 minutes when we realized this is fucking stupid so I decide to go upstairs to see what’s going on. While walking up the stairs I see 3 cops with their guns drawn at me yelling to get to the floor and show my hands. I drop down and proceed to almost have a mental breakdown. After the cops put handcuffs on me and start questioning me Daniel says “wait I know him, I think there has been a misunderstanding”
After Daniel explained to the cops that he though I was an intruder, he and the cops apologized and left. My buddies were still in the basement hiding in a closet while all this went down. They could hear all the yelling and thought I was gonna go to jail.”
3
Wacky Backy: Cactus
Matthew, 21
“Some friends and I were in a nature park getting high to celebrate school being out, and just as were leaving, fried as fuck, a police officer pulls into the parking lot. We are on our way down the hill, see him pull in and stop where we are. He can’t see us, but we can hear every detail. We hear his car door open, and my brother dives facefirst into a cactus to hide. He doesn’t make a sound, and we’re all just staring at this point trying not to break down laughing. When the cop leaves, we say “come on man we’re leaving.” He’s so fried he won’t move, just keeps asking why he should get out of the cactus. Took us 30 mins to convince him lol, now he won’t ever go back there.”
4
Wacky Backy: Funning Looking Owl
Tristan, 24
“We used to go down to an abandoned train station to smoke in my home town. It was so isolated and huge, which is why it made for the perfect place to go and smoke with friends, skateboard and just generally hang out.
So my friend and I were sitting on the edge of the platform smoking a joint and chatting away at about 1am. It was so silent and peaceful. No wind blowing, no noise at all. It was a serene moment.
While we’re blazing, we see a white owl come and land on the platform. My friend and I freak the fuck out. An OWL?! A WHITE OWL?! HERE?! (This is on the East Coast of South Africa, we don’t see many owls, if any). F****ck, we were so taken back by this owl. It blew our minds that this majestic creature had chosen to grace us with it’s presence. It truly must have been our spirit animal reaching out to us in a moment of enlightenment.
So my friend pulls out his disposable camera and snaps a shot. We high five, hug, and smoke another joint in celebration. Minds are blown all over the fucking train station.
A few weeks later and we’ve told everyone about our experience. It was so “out of body”, man. Such a spiritual experience that cannot be expressed in mere words.
Anyway, my friend got his pictures developed and it was a seagull.”
5
Wacky Backy: Poor Jess
Eugene, 25
“The first time I did a gas mask, I sat on my friend’s bed opening and closing my mouth because I thought I was Pac-Man.
Later that night, he found me sitting in the pantry shoveling handfuls of roasted peanuts from a jar into my mouth.
And even later that night, we went out front to have a cigarette – it had snowed and his stairs were super icy. Not half a second after he said “Be careful, the stairs are icy,” I slip, fall all the way down the stairs and nail this girl Jess who was walking down the stairs in front of me, who wipes out hard as a result.
Even worse: about a year later, we’re at a party at another friend’s house and I’m ripped again. He has a stoop with one step and I stumble off it. At that exact moment, Jess is walking by and I full-force palm her in the face, and she falls down in the gravel driveway. She was very careful around me at parties after that.”
6
Wacky Backy: FBI
Canvas, 20
“I had put a blunt out, maybe ten minutes go by, I’m laying in bed, suddenly there’s a loud knock on my door. These times I lived with 5 other roommates at the time, so it wasn’t a loud knock on the front door, but on my bedroom door. I knew no one in the house would knock like that, so I hide my stash, and open the door, and it’s the state’s equivalent of the FBI, two agents. Turns out our other roommate (the 7th person living there that we had actually kicked out a few weeks beforehand) had been breaking and entering into people’s houses and robbing them at gunpoint. They sit me down and question me, and tell me they smell the weed, and tell me to show them where my weed is.
I gave them the dime sack that I had, and they proceed to threaten to arrest me if I don’t give them information about the whereabouts of my former roommate. I said I didn’t know anything, and this was a little after midnight, they told me if they hadn’t found him by 3a.m. they’d come back and arrest me for possession. When they were leaving one of them said “Is it any good?” The other guy smelled it and said “Nope, just mids.” and they left. They never came back, but needless to say I didn’t get any sleep that night. Scariest moment of my life.”
7
Wacky Backy: Tomatoes
Clarissa, 34
“One time when I was high I saw blood clots in my poo and thought I had a terrible case of arse cancer. Drove myself to hospital. Doctor spends a while running tests etc. But after about 2 hours I had to sheepishly explain to him that I had eaten a lot of sun dried tomatoes the night before and that I was probably actually fine.”
8
Wacky Backy: Chinese
Cam, 24
“I was smoking with my cousins and couple friends getting ripped before heading off to a chinese buffet. Now, mind you, I LOVE chinese food.
So I walk out the car feeling a straight daze over me, eyes low, giant smirk, and all I think of is “I’m going to bankrupt this place.” so we all walk in, pay, and start getting our food. I may have been blitzed but Im orderly and neatly arrange 3 plates. First to the table, I get comfy and stare at my plates in pure Aww. Then it happens. The giggles. I start giggling like a crushing school girl and my cousin asks if I’m okay and I just burst. I can’t stop laughing and it’s starting to get a lot of attention.
30mins in and I still cant stop laughing, everyone in my table just has their heads down in their food or are making idol talk to ignore the fact that I’m going off like a broken laugh track on repeat. I finally catch my breath when the waitress comes and asks if we need anything and I start going off yet again. After about a hour and a half we finally leave and I start hearing the “Dude the hell happened in there?” All I can think of to say was “I have no idea””
9
Wacky Backy: German
Pam, 27
“My first year of college, my roommate and I decided to get stoned and watch Pineapple Express (of course). Ten minutes into the movie, my roommate turns to me with a confused look and says, ‘Why is it in German?’ Yep, we’d been watching the movie in a different language and neither of us realized it. It took us another five minutes to realize it wasn’t German, but in fact, Spanish.”
10
Wacky Backy: Over compensating
Moan, 39
“While I was high, my husband and I were discussing a certain sex thing we wanted to try that required a dildo with a suction cup. I went online to order one. Apparently, in my intoxicated state, I failed to check the length. It arrived a few days later. I opened the box and found a monstrous 3-foot dong, which was, uh, a tad long for our purpose.”
Everyone has a funny story from when they were high. We are just glad to be able to share some of them with you today! The age old debate of whether weed should be legalised still echoes on through society today, but with the good times and laughs and health benefits that the drug produces, if made safe, it could be a massive benefit to legalise! If you want to buy the t-shirt that inspired todays blog please click here. If you would like to read more funny marijuana stories, please click here. Stay safe guys, see you next week!
